Sunday, July 9, 2017

In defense of Michelle Carter

 Let's talk about Michelle Carter's case.
To see details about the case, please see the references at the end of the page.

In my opinion Michelle Carter is a victim of Conrad Roy.

Conrad Roy was already suicidal even before meeting Michelle Carter.
He had already tried suicide before.
Then he met Michelle Carter in 2012.
Their relationship was mostly through text messages, rarely meeting in person.
He was constantly talking about suicide with Michelle Carter.
He was looking for someone to help him commit suicide.
Michelle Carter kept refusing, trying to convince him to give up.
Then in July 2014, after 2 years, he finally brain-washed her.

It is not clear why she changed her mind, but there are 2 possibilities.
After crying wolf for such a long time Michelle Carter probably thought it was just a prank. She possibly thought he was not being really serious and would never really commit suicide, and somehow this was just a game or a prank.
The other possibilitiy is that she was trying to be a good girlfriend and be supportive.
As a good girlfriend she cannot keep antagonizing her boyfriend, otherwise she would end up losing the boyfriend. Many women end up supporting the boyfriend or husband, even when he is a criminal and about to commit a crime. She didn't want to lose the boyfriend, she didn't want to ruin the relationship, she wanted to be a good girlfriend by being supportive and cooperative and encouraging and understanding. So she started saying the things he wanted to hear. Maybe she thought that by being cooperative and understanding at first, she could somehow change his mind later. Because antagonizing him was clearly not working.

He has finally manipulated Michelle Carter to encourage him to commit suicide.
He searches the internet to look for ways to commit suicide.
He comes up with the idea of carbon monoxide poisoning.
He then sends a message to Michelle Carter. She promises to stay online with him all night.
He drives his truck to a remote parking lot.
He sets up the portable generator.

But he is a coward. He becomes afraid of dying, and gets out of the car. But he still wants to commit suicide. So he takes out his phone and calls Michelle Carter. To ask for encouragement. She is trying to be a supportive and loving girfriend.  She wants to help her boyfriend. She then says what he wants to hear: get back in the truck.

Even when he tried to stop the suicide attempt by getting out of the car, he was the one to call Michelle Carter and ask for reassurance. Michelle Carter did not call him. He called her. No one forced him to call her. No one forced him to send messages to her.

Conrad Roy manipulated Michelle Carter into encouraging him to commit suicide.
He didn't care about her.
He didn't care about her well-being.
It never occurred to him what would happen to her after he committed suicide.
He would worry about his mother and sisters but not about his girlfriend.
If Conrad Roy were a good boyfriend who cared about his girlfriend, he would never commit suicide. He would instead dedicate his life in making her happy.
He never tries to make her happy. Because he is just using her. Because he is just manipulating her.
He only cared about himself.
He only cared about committing suicide, because he wanted to call attention to himself.
He wanted an accomplice for his crime.
If Michelle Carter had refused to help, he would have broken up with her and looked for someone else.
He was a coward, he didn't have the courage to commit suicide by himself, so he looked for someone to help him commit suicide.
Instead of going to hell alone, he dragged her with him.
He wanted an accomplice so he could put the blame for his actions on someone else.

Now she is paying the price for his crime.
It is his responsibility, not hers.

On the other hand, let's play the Devil's advocate and assume that Michelle Carter is evil, that she is the responsible for Conrad Roy's suicide, that she always wanted from the very beginning to kill him.
Is that even possible?  Did Michelle Carter plan all this?
No matter how dumb Michelle Carter may be, certainly there are better ways to kill someone than coaxing to commit suicide!
If Michelle Carter really wanted to murder Conrad Roy, certainly she could have thought of a better, more straightforward way to do that , a way that doesn't leave several incriminatory text messages behind.
Did Michelle Carter want Conrad Roy to die with his phone by his side with her messages urging him to commit suicide?
Did she want his phone to be found by the police? Did she want the police to see her messages urging him to commit suicide? Did she want to go to jail? Did she plan all this?
This is completely ridiculous, it is highly unlikely that she planned all this.
Most 17-year-old girls don't know what carbon monoxide is.
Most 17-year-old girls don't know how to set up a portable generator.
Most 17-year-old girls don't even know what a generator is.
I don't know what a generator is.
Conrad Roy came up with idea of suicide.
Conrad Roy came up with idea of carbon monoxide poisoning.
Conrad Roy set up the generator.
Michelle Carter probably didn't even know what he was talking about.

What would you do if someone you love tells you he/she wants to commit suicide?
Do you simply say "don't do it"?
If you keep antagonizing and denying the other person's feelings and reasonings, you will end up driving that person away. He/she will stop talking to you since you don't listen, you don't understand, you make no efforts to understand.
You have to be understanding and accepting and listen to the other person, let the other person talk, without being  judgemental.

Michelle Carter is not a psychologist. Even though she was correct at first in the way she handled her boyfriend, somehow she got carried away, she ended up being brain-washed by him and making the mistake of taking his side completely.

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